Friday, March 13

I'm letting you go.

"I went to a tattoo parlor and had yes written onto the palm of my left hand, and no onto my right palm. What can I say? It hasn't made my life wonderful, its made life possible. When I rub my hands against each other in the middle of winter I am warming myself with the friction of yes and no. When I clap my hands I am showing my appreciation through the uniting and parting of yes and no. I signify "book" by peeling open my hands, every book, for me, is the balance of yes and no, even this one, my last one, especially this one.
Does it break my heart? Of course, every moment of every day, into more pieces than my heart was made of.
I never thought of myself as quiet, much less silent. I never thought about things at all. Everything changed.
The distance that wedged itself between me and my happiness wasn't the world, it wasn't the bombs and burning buildings, it was me, my thinking, the cancer of never letting go.
Is ignorance bliss? I don't know, but it's so painful to think, and tell me, what did thinking ever do for me? To what great place did thinking ever bring me? I think and think and think. I've thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it."

- Jonathan Safran Foer








I finally realized, there is no reason for me to feel this way. I deserve to be happy.
I don't deserve all the heartache I've been getting.
All this time I have been letting people convince me otherwise.
Now I'm taking my life back into my own hands.
I'm eliminating those who have done me wrong, who have broken my heart, who have been careless with my emotions.
As much as it hurts right now, it will get better.
It has to get better.

I have faith.


It's time to let go..

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